And now I want to talk about Edinburgh at present. (This is the super fun part of waiting forever to blog… you all get to see my split personalities! Teeehee) Let’s be real, if you know me, this is as organized as my ADD lets me get 🙂
I’ve been having a moment or two. You know, one of those “sit back and look at life” moments. I am the kind of person who has been looking forward to her life, her whole life, if you follow. I am always looking forward to the next step, waiting for the perfect. Subconsciously putting my life on hold because I am holding out for what the future holds.
For the first time in a VERY long time, my now and my future have collided. I am happy here not just because I am living out a personal dream and goal, but because I truly feel like God has me right where I need to be. I am happy because I feel like I belong. I have spent many years being the odd one out and feeling just ok with it, because I knew who I was and I knew I just needed to find where I fit. While this might not be where I stay, this is right where I belong, right now.
I have great flat mates who are fast becoming my family. I feel like their mama bear and feed them my culinary creations… No one seems to complain haha. They take care of me when I’m to stubborn to take care of myself, and we work through our struggles together that come with living in a foreign country. I love them, and I will be truly heartbroken when I have to say goodbye in six months.
I have amazing classmates who remind me to LIVE in this awesome place we have all moved to! They remind me to laugh no matter how rough the classwork is, and to take time to enjoy life instead of holing up in our dungeon *cough cough* er, studio. We are all here to learn and grow as students, but I am learning so much more from these guys, my favorite goofballs 🙂
I am blessed to have found a great church community. The college-ish folk have accepted me and care for me like I have been there for years! My dear friend Moira has firmly lodged herself in my heart from day one, and for reasons I still haven’t figured out, spoils me ROTTEN. She has become my Scottish Grandma, this feisty 75 year old with more spunk than anyone I know. She offered her HOUSE to my parents and I over Hogmanay, and slept at her neighbor’s house so the three of us could stay together!!! If that ain’t generosity, I don’t know what is.
And always always always, I have the love of my family and friends cheer-leading from 4112 miles away. My heart aches from missing you, but the encouragement you send keeps me going when I feel like breaking down. You are all the reasons I had the courage to go on my big adventure.
I am still learning, still loving, still laughing, still making mistakes. I look a little less like a doe-eyed tourist and still explore the crevices of this old city. It’s weird to think back to where I was last year and to imagine what I would be doing if I hadn’t said yes to this crazy adventure. It makes me even more thankful to the people who kicked me out the door and told me not to be afraid, to live this adventure with my coattails blazing! Even though I don’t know where I’m headed, I just keep walking where God tells me and find joy in knowing I am where he wants me to be 🙂
Love and Laughs,